Self is a process of becoming, of expansion. The question is how are you appreciating yourself? The most gracious compliment I’ve ever received was “I can be myself around you.” This came from my sweetheart and business partner. She and I can be fully present with each other and it’s an amazing feeling. We make a good team because we decided on a few basic principles: we want the best for each other, we want to grow together, and we want our peace. Through the fires and tribulations that we’ve been through, we arrived at these principles and decided that we want to live well. This is our vision. The vision is the journey. The journey is home.
Long ago, I worked at a creative digital agency and asked a designer on the team, “when do you feel your best at work?” Without a blink, he said, “when I feel at home.” I became very curious about this idea of feeling at home at work and how we can go about creating this sense for ourselves and others.
The great people and companies in our time have some things in common: they are clear about who they are and where they stand. Apple’s great comeback with the return of Steve Jobs was due to the renewed sense of vision and vitality that Jobs helped reignite. Zappos, known for its “wow” customer service, implements its 10 core values into all parts of its hiring and engagement procedures. 3M tackled the 2008 recession by buckling down on trust training for their employees and sailed through with minimum layoffs. These companies are continually bursting with innovation. Principles in action create culture.
Being clear about where you stand is at the core of self-awareness. An unshakable trust in the process is what keeps you focused and stable, not some far-flung-future. The future is a process and to be future-proof (a term people seem to like these days), you must know why you’re in it to begin with. What do you put first? What do you trust and cherish most? Where is your heart most planted? The clarity of your being will shed clarity to those around and trust can emerge. I always say success is a journey of self-awareness. Here are four ways to feel at home, no matter where we are on the journey.
- Courage – believe in yourself, stretch yourself. Learn to dance with the unknown.
- Solitude – be beside yourself. Quiet the chatter and arrive at your own voice. It will lead to your true north.
- Empathy – go beyond yourself. Empathy transforms us and what builds empathy is empty ear. Ears full of emotion and chatter kill trust. Ears that can hear build it.
- Gratitude – appreciate what’s in front of you. This is so crucial. Appreciating each breath and the two eyes that can see. Look at the colors. Be inspired by the scents. A friend once told me, “if you notice something you appreciate about someone, let them know immediately.”
In sum, the clarity of one’s vision determines focus and stability – that sense of home. Self-awareness is a process that fosters trust in relationships and speed in action. And it begins with knowing where your heart is most.