As I entered the second week of my Expressive Arts training in the Alps of Switzerland, there was a need to rediscover myself in a fresh way. It has been quite challenging. I’ve had to face some critical questions like, what does it mean to grow as an artist? What does it mean to surrender control and fully trust what emerges? And what is the role of beauty in the creative process?
I’ve played with such questions for some time now as they form the basis of my thinking, but I have had to face them on an entirely new level and test my capacity to be present and grow through the uncertainty. What better way to do this than deep in the valley of giant mountains? The metaphor is appropriate as I would feel alone, like I was climbing this mountain on my own, wanting to reach the top because the untamed mountain somehow belonged to me. What I was really confronting was myself and the self-criticism that needed to be released.
Amidst the doubts and frustrations, a simple yet empowering distinction had surfaced from the wise words of one of my instructors. The distinction was between a difficulty and a problem. While I was deeply challenged and faced great difficulty, it was not a problematic experience; I could move through it and continue to shape the feeling through art. My capacity to shape may vary depending on the situation, but shaping occurs nonetheless. This was an important lesson because it changed my frame of reference from being fixed or stuck to a position of movement and growth.
When facing discomfort, we may enter a state of chaos and polarity. The gift from the experience is a greater depth in clarity and creativity. The way is to be resilient and not only accept, but actually like the process. That is not to cling on to it and adore it, but to let it be as it is and be a witness of this ever changing moment.